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i feel guilty with what have i done..the beast that i become those days..hence i want to repentance myself..find the meaning of life..try to understand the world..try to understand people..try to be patient..becomes humble again..what is life..what is those means..why world like this..why i born into this world..and die in the end..what is feeling..why this feeling is hurt inside..what is inside..how should i control it..why i must follow this but not follow what i want..what's wrong with me..what am i lacking..what should i to do to fulfill myself..my desire..i want to be better and better..

oh God, have mercy on me..forgive my sins..