Deleting memory
Since im at home, i have my ex stuff .so, no point again to keep her stuff. tonight i gonna burn it. As good bye part of journey.
Even she run back to me, say hi to me, or cross over. i would make straight face. in future. I know there is 1st love is hard to take it out but well, that is life, part of it.
I can't accept her anymore, the mood swing suddenly, the stubbornness suddenly, hard and beg for her to come back but no. she made me pity at begged her, i think and i ashamed to myself as a man i do that. i feel zero my worth in front of her but time after time, i know how much worth that she not deserves of who i am. it's my fault turn to dark monster that i myself fail recognise who am i and fail to down to earth. It hurt inside, it's very deep hurt inside. I fell very deep for her. I dropped my guard to love her. She have eye on other man during early relationship before, i think i can't give her 100% of me. but only i have feeling with other girl then she cried her eye water for me. from that moment, i gave 100% of me to her because she proved she really love me but that is wrong, totally wrong keep hurting her though want her back. no 100%...give 99%..1 % for me. anything happens, 1% is my last chance.
In her mind, i'm not good as that man, i not make her feel special since we were in long distance relationship while that man near to her and ding ding make her special.
One night i waited in front her house just to meet her. wait till 12 am, then she came back but that man sent her back, its rare for me to see her smile wide like that like in my relationship before. She said she have nothing special with that guy but i sense something. i brave myself to asked that guy. what is his relationship with her. he said as "close friend" and he said he though she is single as she acts as single person. that why he dares to flirt with her. A disappointed answer and action from her. If she didn't say enjoyable to mention, let's get married. couldn't take the relationship seriously and no need to meet her family.
Just because a man nearby give u special feeling and treatment? This type of woman is sort of ungrateful for what i done to her, what i willing done to her. even she done what for me? does she fight for me? no. horrible person to be partner in relationship.
i glad that man take her out from my life.
i made great mistakes to hurt her over and over again because i feel hurt. but now
i tired of this feeling (that's good) i can throw it. i release it, the anger towards both of them, cheated on me.
next relationship, i'm take seriously of it. any lack from past relationship i try to improve. and i will win her heart over and over again but she must do the same also. there is no point only one side do all the job. no no no..its must goes both way. If i sense and think of this, i will directly discuss to her. if no improvement, i break up the relationship in good way.
So, so long true fucker and pure motherfucker! once and for all. Justice prevail! May God Bless ya
Dance dance dance with me in the shower. looks the boy and girl crap a lots in shower.
Even she run back to me, say hi to me, or cross over. i would make straight face. in future. I know there is 1st love is hard to take it out but well, that is life, part of it.
I can't accept her anymore, the mood swing suddenly, the stubbornness suddenly, hard and beg for her to come back but no. she made me pity at begged her, i think and i ashamed to myself as a man i do that. i feel zero my worth in front of her but time after time, i know how much worth that she not deserves of who i am. it's my fault turn to dark monster that i myself fail recognise who am i and fail to down to earth. It hurt inside, it's very deep hurt inside. I fell very deep for her. I dropped my guard to love her. She have eye on other man during early relationship before, i think i can't give her 100% of me. but only i have feeling with other girl then she cried her eye water for me. from that moment, i gave 100% of me to her because she proved she really love me but that is wrong, totally wrong keep hurting her though want her back. no 100%...give 99%..1 % for me. anything happens, 1% is my last chance.
In her mind, i'm not good as that man, i not make her feel special since we were in long distance relationship while that man near to her and ding ding make her special.
One night i waited in front her house just to meet her. wait till 12 am, then she came back but that man sent her back, its rare for me to see her smile wide like that like in my relationship before. She said she have nothing special with that guy but i sense something. i brave myself to asked that guy. what is his relationship with her. he said as "close friend" and he said he though she is single as she acts as single person. that why he dares to flirt with her. A disappointed answer and action from her. If she didn't say enjoyable to mention, let's get married. couldn't take the relationship seriously and no need to meet her family.
Just because a man nearby give u special feeling and treatment? This type of woman is sort of ungrateful for what i done to her, what i willing done to her. even she done what for me? does she fight for me? no. horrible person to be partner in relationship.
i glad that man take her out from my life.
i made great mistakes to hurt her over and over again because i feel hurt. but now
i tired of this feeling (that's good) i can throw it. i release it, the anger towards both of them, cheated on me.
next relationship, i'm take seriously of it. any lack from past relationship i try to improve. and i will win her heart over and over again but she must do the same also. there is no point only one side do all the job. no no no..its must goes both way. If i sense and think of this, i will directly discuss to her. if no improvement, i break up the relationship in good way.
So, so long true fucker and pure motherfucker! once and for all. Justice prevail! May God Bless ya
Dance dance dance with me in the shower. looks the boy and girl crap a lots in shower.
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